August and Everything Before

Things I learned this summer in Shanghai/Beijing/Conway/Texarkana/LittleRock/Oswego/Middleton/Plano/Chicago, and the spaces in between have been great.

At the beginning of the summer, I was coming off a streak of independence (in the unhealthy sense) that boosted me straight through my time of studying and partying in Shanghai. I learned a lot and got to spend time with some really cool people, but I wouldn't say that I'm particularly proud of how all of my time there was spent.

Lesson 1: If you throw up at the end of the night, it was not a good night.

Lesson 2: Fun is different than good.

In Beijing, I spent my time seeing movies and hanging out at malls and seeing China and reconnecting with old friends and playing Transformers with cute little blond kids. I also spent time doing some digging into that mystery that is Christianity in the Middle Kingdom. It was interesting to say the very least, and I met some fantastically inspirational people and got to witness some things that make occasional headlines.

Lesson 3: Children are really a source of vitality. No wonder old people like to squeeze babies' cheeks so much.

Lesson 4: Even dirty cities have beautiful days, and this summer Beijing did not disappoint.

Lesson 5: If you ever have the chance, explore the parts of the Great Wall that the signs say not to. (And, if the mood strikes, pee off the Wall.)

Lesson 6: Watch your drinks like a hawk when you're at a bar. Roofies are no laughing matter.

Next, I returned to Arkansas by way of Shanghai and Chicago with a bank account in the negative.

Lesson 7: Even though we are probably among the most cynical people in the world, Americans can detect sincerity and will sometimes even help out someone in need. Even if that means $3 to a broke guy so he can get to the airport on the maglev train.

Lesson 8: Friends are amazing people. Don't discount them. Ever.

In Conway, I partied my hind-quarters off for about a week, got to see people I love, and made some choices better than others. Fostered a ridiculous crush (don't even bother asking) and methodically made up for the loneliness I felt in Beijing by being nocturnal to spend time with friends until after sunrise.

Lesson 9: Jetlag sucks sometimes, but sometimes I can be awesome.

Lesson 10: Just because I make stupid decisions sometimes doesn't mean that my life is over. It just takes time to process and redirect.

Lesson 11: Lust (and its logical conclusions) < Love

Then I went to Texarkana for a few days and saw my parents, did some reading and studied some Chinese at Starbucks.

Lesson 12: Starbucks everywhere have creepers that like to hang out there and feel important.

Lesson 13: Family is important, even when it drives me crazy.

Next came a very brief stint in Conway leading to a roadtrip to Illinois. I stayed in the western edge of the Chicagoland sprawl for most of the time, and I went into the city a few times in the month that I was interning for Jacob's Well. During this time, my sister had a daughter and I became the world's proudest uncle.

Lesson 14: Growth will happen in a healthy environment. It doesn't take coercion.

Lesson 15: (via Erwin McManus) Hope and Laughter are crucial to the human spirit. Without them, we will stop being fully human and live apart from what we could be. It seems overly simplified, but I'm learning that it's true. Without something to look forward to, we lose all sense of purpose. Without laughter (which people do naturally, interestingly enough), we stop connecting with the world, and we stop being able to deal. (See the book Soul Cravings).

Lesson 16: I am a city dweller at heart.

Lesson 17: Organizations are inherently flawed because they are made of people. An organization without flaws is simply being dishonest. And the beauty is that people can adapt and grow and learn.

Lesson 18: I can walk anyone through the complexities of ordering coffee beverages.

Lesson 19: I love people.

Lesson 20: I can be in total love with someone I've never met simply because of who she is to me.

I returned to Arkansas, to Conway, and set up shop again. School has begun, and now I am getting back on the bicycle that is my academic career. My friends are back, and I'm looking forward to graduation, graduate school, and life after studies.

Lesson 21: I cannot reiterate it enough: friends are the family we choose.

Lesson 22: "Though we travel the world over to find the beautiful, we must carry it with us or we find it not." - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Lesson 23: When a place is left, it changes. When it is returned to, it is different. People change, move, flow, flex, grow, recede. Trying to fit back into a previous mold is as useful as trying to step in the same river twice (just as our Taoist friends). A new trail must be blazed with the machete of experience and the wisdom of failures past.

And so it is. Just so, and never ended. With greatest love.

T